What is a hurricane, many ask. Well, a hurricane is a big blustery
bog of hot air, similar to what politician's use to propel themselves.
A hurricane is a himicane on steroids, blowing up to 25,000 mph
(inside a wind tunnel of course) and can be up to 7.8345 gazillion
miles in diameter.
A hurricane in the Category 27 variety blows hard enough to shake
all of your ancestors right off the family tree. No, seriously,
what is a hurricane, you ask.
A hurricane, with most seriousness and reverence is a mass of air
originating at the equator inside a volcano on a small Atlantic
island known as Pacifico. Instead of spewing lava, which it does
on occasion, this volcano, known to the natives as Colonus Eruptis,
belches, spews and otherwise flatulates hot air from the bowels
of its depths into the mild Atlantic air.
This hot vortex of air spins counterclockwise and as it spreads
out, takes on more energy from El Nino, global warming, dependency
upon foreign oil and Richard Simmons and becomes a class one hurricane
of magnificent proportions.
The hurricane then moves northwards, picks up an Anglo-Saxon name,
wreaks havoc in the Caribbean, then causes politicians all sorts
of trouble if it moves one iota closer to the good ole U. S. A.
Hurricanes are typically named after the dogs of famous Presidents.
What is a hurricane? Now aren't you glad you asked?